Although Kage's words hurt you, don't worry about influence. The people in the fandom he's critizing have stuck around, and will continue to do so! You're good, you're safe. That's not to say Kage is without influence - ask Varka about not being to sell his wares at Anthrocon any more - but his influence only extends as far as running Anthrocon, and that's about it. I'm fairly pro-Kage but I don't like how he sometimes words things. There's a video clip of him somewhere where he blames ConFurence for the reputation of the fandom and that "it's been an albatross around our neck ever since", which is a really unfair and uncalled-for low blow.
If it helps, don't think of Anthrocon as a one-man show; the convention has a board of 8 members, and trust me when I say some of their personal tastes are far different from Kage's. Kage doesn't even have the power to ban anyone from the con, that power rests with the board. Kage's stage performances at Anthrocon are popular, but I don't think anyone attends the con because of him - they attend because the entire, huge team of staff and volunteers run a really good show. A lot of attendants don't particularly care one way or the other that he's there. Looking at the programming schedule from a couple of years ago I'm seeing panels on macro/micro, adult writing, kink writing, mature art, inner animals, and therianthropy.
And there are lots of other furry conventions with their own con chairs, and they all pretty much give the same guarded description of the fandom to journalists. It's not going to whitewash the fandom, because the moment you explore the fandom, you can see the reality is a lot more complex and adult than the public relations spin.
Oh dear - you'd have no way of knowing this, but over the past couple of years, there's been a push by some to stop using the phrase "come out as furry". The rationale is aimed at new furries who are teens, still living at home with their parents, that if you want to talk to them about this interest of yours, it's better if it doesn't sound like you've been afraid of admitting to it (because that implies there's something the parents should be afraid about), and that it's better to give a positive (or even offhand) attitude about it.
Confusingly, the fandom's been throwing very mixed signals to new teen furries. You get "Be comfortable with your furriness!", yet also "Actually to be on the safe side you don't have to bring it up." Because it kind of sounds odd, like "coming out as a trainspotter", "coming out as a vegetarian", "coming out as a Taylor Swift fan". Most strangers don't want to know too closely what your hobbies, kinks, political opinions, religious feelings, etc. are - but the whole point of any group who wants to hang out together, means you have to be able to communicate your interest. Some people take it slow, feel things out, get to know people, and find out what everyone's comfort levels are. Other people are like "Screw it, here's what I'm into." It's one of the neverending debates.
You also make a very keen observation about being accepting and being tolerant. The meaning of "accept" can vary wildly from furry to furry. Some furries link acceptance and toleration very tightly together, others less so (Kage, obviously). This is one of those hidden biases I was talking about in my earlier post, about what the fandom means to you. Accepting someone else in the fandom doesn't mean you have to like them, doesn't mean you support or approve of their interests or behavior. You don't accept aspects of Kage, and that doesn't mean that you're less of an accepting person. Kage doesn't accept Chew Fox and Chew Fox doesn't accept Kage and so on. That's what makes toleration so very important. If someone's not comfortable with the adult aspects and LGBT-positive atmosphere of furry then they're going to have a hard time, but we don't expect everyone to accept anything and everything.
Every fur has their personal tastes. The better we try to get along with things that aren't to our tastes, the less fights we have. We leave acceptance and tolerance up to individual choice. When someone in the fandom organizes a group event, takes commissions, hosts an art website - anything involving several people - only then do we have to work out some kind of group agreement. What one group decides doesn't apply to what any other group decides. We get along as best we can, but you can see from these message board threads that it's not entirely happy-happy. You say you want "a community where you can feel safe and respected by your peers" - You're safe. No mass uprising unless you start raping children or something.
The being-respected-by-your-peers part - 100% approval is unlikely for anyone. Chew Fox goes in front of the media, people don't like her. Kage goes in front of the media, people don't like him. My friend Marlos has a wonderful analogy for furry fandom, that it's like a buffet, you pick and choose what you like and you ignore what you don't. However there is a danger in ignoring people you disagree with; occasionally they have a valid observation. This is where civility comes in! Also known as an aspect of Wheaton's Law.
I kind of wish this documentary hadn't included Boomer or Kage. I think they're both fairly unique and that neither really speak for the group, though I'd be hard-pressed to find someone who could. Also be careful of applying a hobbyist/lifestyler perspective too strictly, and what traits they include - the fandom's complicated, and to discuss it, we all simplify concepts and create categories. The majority of fans have both lifestyle and hobbyist aspects to their take on furry, and some don't really fit either label. Once we start getting down to the nitty-gritty complexities of the fandom, the simplified categories stop working and can hinder discussion more than they helped when we were talking at a more general level.
That being said I'd also like to say thanks for jumping into Flayrah - we don't have too many regular commenters and it's nice to see a fresh face. Don't take us as a representative slice of the fandom either, some of these arguments have been going around in circles for years. :-) If you're feeling exasperated, take heart in this recent reddit post!
Although Kage's words hurt you, don't worry about influence. The people in the fandom he's critizing have stuck around, and will continue to do so! You're good, you're safe. That's not to say Kage is without influence - ask Varka about not being to sell his wares at Anthrocon any more - but his influence only extends as far as running Anthrocon, and that's about it. I'm fairly pro-Kage but I don't like how he sometimes words things. There's a video clip of him somewhere where he blames ConFurence for the reputation of the fandom and that "it's been an albatross around our neck ever since", which is a really unfair and uncalled-for low blow.
If it helps, don't think of Anthrocon as a one-man show; the convention has a board of 8 members, and trust me when I say some of their personal tastes are far different from Kage's. Kage doesn't even have the power to ban anyone from the con, that power rests with the board. Kage's stage performances at Anthrocon are popular, but I don't think anyone attends the con because of him - they attend because the entire, huge team of staff and volunteers run a really good show. A lot of attendants don't particularly care one way or the other that he's there. Looking at the programming schedule from a couple of years ago I'm seeing panels on macro/micro, adult writing, kink writing, mature art, inner animals, and therianthropy.
And there are lots of other furry conventions with their own con chairs, and they all pretty much give the same guarded description of the fandom to journalists. It's not going to whitewash the fandom, because the moment you explore the fandom, you can see the reality is a lot more complex and adult than the public relations spin.
Oh dear - you'd have no way of knowing this, but over the past couple of years, there's been a push by some to stop using the phrase "come out as furry". The rationale is aimed at new furries who are teens, still living at home with their parents, that if you want to talk to them about this interest of yours, it's better if it doesn't sound like you've been afraid of admitting to it (because that implies there's something the parents should be afraid about), and that it's better to give a positive (or even offhand) attitude about it.
Confusingly, the fandom's been throwing very mixed signals to new teen furries. You get "Be comfortable with your furriness!", yet also "Actually to be on the safe side you don't have to bring it up." Because it kind of sounds odd, like "coming out as a trainspotter", "coming out as a vegetarian", "coming out as a Taylor Swift fan". Most strangers don't want to know too closely what your hobbies, kinks, political opinions, religious feelings, etc. are - but the whole point of any group who wants to hang out together, means you have to be able to communicate your interest. Some people take it slow, feel things out, get to know people, and find out what everyone's comfort levels are. Other people are like "Screw it, here's what I'm into." It's one of the neverending debates.
You also make a very keen observation about being accepting and being tolerant. The meaning of "accept" can vary wildly from furry to furry. Some furries link acceptance and toleration very tightly together, others less so (Kage, obviously). This is one of those hidden biases I was talking about in my earlier post, about what the fandom means to you. Accepting someone else in the fandom doesn't mean you have to like them, doesn't mean you support or approve of their interests or behavior. You don't accept aspects of Kage, and that doesn't mean that you're less of an accepting person. Kage doesn't accept Chew Fox and Chew Fox doesn't accept Kage and so on. That's what makes toleration so very important. If someone's not comfortable with the adult aspects and LGBT-positive atmosphere of furry then they're going to have a hard time, but we don't expect everyone to accept anything and everything.
Every fur has their personal tastes. The better we try to get along with things that aren't to our tastes, the less fights we have. We leave acceptance and tolerance up to individual choice. When someone in the fandom organizes a group event, takes commissions, hosts an art website - anything involving several people - only then do we have to work out some kind of group agreement. What one group decides doesn't apply to what any other group decides. We get along as best we can, but you can see from these message board threads that it's not entirely happy-happy. You say you want "a community where you can feel safe and respected by your peers" - You're safe. No mass uprising unless you start raping children or something.
The being-respected-by-your-peers part - 100% approval is unlikely for anyone. Chew Fox goes in front of the media, people don't like her. Kage goes in front of the media, people don't like him. My friend Marlos has a wonderful analogy for furry fandom, that it's like a buffet, you pick and choose what you like and you ignore what you don't. However there is a danger in ignoring people you disagree with; occasionally they have a valid observation. This is where civility comes in! Also known as an aspect of Wheaton's Law.
I kind of wish this documentary hadn't included Boomer or Kage. I think they're both fairly unique and that neither really speak for the group, though I'd be hard-pressed to find someone who could. Also be careful of applying a hobbyist/lifestyler perspective too strictly, and what traits they include - the fandom's complicated, and to discuss it, we all simplify concepts and create categories. The majority of fans have both lifestyle and hobbyist aspects to their take on furry, and some don't really fit either label. Once we start getting down to the nitty-gritty complexities of the fandom, the simplified categories stop working and can hinder discussion more than they helped when we were talking at a more general level.
That being said I'd also like to say thanks for jumping into Flayrah - we don't have too many regular commenters and it's nice to see a fresh face. Don't take us as a representative slice of the fandom either, some of these arguments have been going around in circles for years. :-) If you're feeling exasperated, take heart in this recent reddit post!